Is there a word or a phrase you use (or overuse) all the time, and are seemingly unable to get rid of? If not, what’s the one that drives you crazy when others use it?

Well, the word “fuck” comes to my mind because despite how hard I try to not saying it, I’ll end up saying it everytime my friends are mocking with me. I used to be a well behaved boy until high school, I didn’t swear, I’m polite to everyone even my closest friends. Then I got bullied because of being a nice boy, some students mock me because they know I will not fight back. And I didn’t.

Funny things I observed is that I’m becoming like them myself, I start swearing and try to look bad, perhaps it was a self defense mechanism for my fragile self esteem at the moment. Since I used many swearing word, I felt that people tend to be afraid of me as well. See the pattern here? It’s like a peer pressure to be cool and not get bullied. What a shame.

Now I swear quite a lot and i get used to it after some time, it has been 4-5 years since I left my good personality and try to be ‘one of the bad guys’ and I have to admit that people does like to bully nerds, defenseless peers. And i think that is the reason a good guy like me could be turned into an asshole, simply because I don’t want to get bullied again!

i’m not encouraging anyone to swear and trust me, once you get used to it, it’s very hard to get rid of it. Your brain will have such reflex to swear everytime a trigger comes, and yes, it does bring some trouble when you swear unappropriately in front of some people.

dp