Because once it is accepted, the fact that life is difficult no longer matters

When we desire to encourage the growth of the human spirit, we challenge and encourage human capacity to solve problems

Tools to cultivate discipline:
Delaying gratification
Acceptance of responsibility
Dedication to truth
Balancing

Delaying gratification is a process of scheduling the pain and pleasure of life in such a way as to enhance the pleasure by meeting and experiencing the pain first and getting it over with

If my parents are willing to suffer with me, then suffering must not be so bad, and i should be willing to suffer with myself

For when children know that they are valued, when they truly feel valued in the deepest parts of themselves, then they feel valuable

This feeling of being valuable is a cornerstone of self discipline because when one considers oneself valuable one will take care of oneself in all ways that are necessary

Anyone who is not mentally defecrive can solve any problem if we are willing to take the time

Problems do not go away. They must be worked through or else they remain, forever a barrier to the growth and development of the spirit

It is choosing to suffer now in the hope of future gratification rather than choosing to continue present gratification in the hope that future suffering will not be necessary

This is my problem and it’s up to me to solve it

If you are not part of the solution, then you are part of the problem-Elderidge Cleaver

It was up to me and me alone to decide how I wanted to use my time

The more clearly we see the reality of the world, the better equipped we are to deal with the world

Transference is that set if ways of perceiving and responding to the world which is developed in childhood and which is usually entirely appropriate to the childhood environment but which is inapprropriately transferred into the adult environment

To know the world, we must not only examine it but we must simultaneously examine the examiner

The tendency to avoid challenge is so omnipresemt in human beings that it can properly be considered a characteristic of human nature

Courageous people must continually push themselves to be completely honest, yet must also possess the capacity to withhold the whole truth when appropriate

The loss of balance is ultimately more painful than the giving up requires to maintain balance

Many people are either unwilling or unable to suffer the pain of giving up the outgrown which needs to be forsaken

We cannot be a source of strength unless we nurture our own strength

We do not have to love. We choose to love

In some respect the act of falling in love is an act of regression

The perception that we ade loving when we fall in love is a false perception, that our subjective sense of lovingness is an illusion

We can choose how to respond fo the experience of falling in love, but we cannot choose the experience itself

What we thought was love epwas not real or true love, and nothing can be done about the situation except to live unhappily ever after or get divorced

If couple stay in therapy, all couples learn that a true acceptance of their own and each other’s individuality and separateness is the only foundation upon shoch a mature marriage can be based and real love can grow

The experience of sexual intercourse, and particularly of orgasm is an experience also associated with a greater or lesser degree of collapse of ego boundaries and attendant ecstasy

True reality can be known only by experiencing the oneness through a giving up of ego boundaries

When you require another individual for your survival, you are a parasite on that individual

Two people love each other only when they are quiet capable of loving without each other but choose to live with each other

Because of their lack of wholeness they have no real sense of identity, and they define themselves solely by their relationships

If you expect another person to make you happy, you’ll be endlessly disappointed

Love is not simply giving. It is judicious giving and judicious criticizing

Anyone who genuinely loves knows the pleasure of loving

Cathecting is the process by which an object becomes important to us

the person who truly loves does so because of a decision to love. This person has made a commitment to be loving whether or nit the loving feeling is present

True listening, total concentratiom on the other, is always a manifestation of love

Courage is not the absence of fear, it is the making of action in spite of fear, the moving out against the resistance engendered by fear into the unknown and into the future

The only real security in life lies in relishing life’s insecurity

Anyone who is truly concerned for the spiritual growth of another knows, consciously or instinctively, that he or she can significantly foster that growth only through a relationship of constancy

The risk of commitment to therapy is not only the risk of commitment itself but also the risk of self confrontation and change

It is impossible to truly understand another without making room for that person within yourself

There are two ways to confront or criticize another human being, with instinctive and spontaneous certainty that one is right, or with a belief that one is probably right arrived at through srupulous self doubting and self examination

The problem is that the more loving one is, the more humble one is, yet the more humble one is, the more one is awes by the potential for arrogance in exercising power

If I truly love another, I will obviously order my behavior in such a way as to contribute the utmost to his or her spiritual growth

Freedom and dpiscipline ade indeed handmaidens, without the discipline of genuine love, freedom is invariably nonloving and destructive

Genuine love not inly respects the individuality if the other but actually seeks to cultivate it, even at the risk of separation or loss

A minor tragedy and it’s God’s fault. A miraculous blessing and it’s a but lucky. What do you make of that?

The religious have not wanted their religion shaken by science, just as scientific have not wanted their science to be shaken by religion

We are all individuals, but we are also parts of a greater while, united in something vast and beautiful beyond description. Perception of the miraculous is the subjective essence if self realization, the root from which man’s highest features and experiences grow-Beyond the norm

If you work long enough and hard enough to understand yourself, you will come to discover that this vast part of your mind, of which you mow have little awareness, contains riches beyond imagination

Dreams are helpful to psychotherapists work

The unconscious is wiser than we are about other people as well as ourselves

The mind, which sometimes presumes to believe that there is no such thing as a miracle, is itself a miracle

Spiritual growth is the evolutiom of an individual. And individual’s body may undergo the changes of the life cycle, but it does not evolve

We do grow. Despite all that resists the process, we do become better human beings

When we grow, it is because we are working at it, and we are working at it because we love ourselves

It is God who is the source of the evolutionary force and God who is fhe destination

If we overcome laziness, all the other impediments will be overcome

There is no greater satisfaction than that of being an expert, of really knowing what we are doing

Spiritual power is not simply awareness, it is the capacity ti maintain one’s ability to still make decisions with greater and greater awareness

Mental illness occurs when the conscious will of the individual substantially deviates from the will of God, which is his or her own unconscious will

For the journey of spiritual growth requires courage and initiative and independence of thought and action. While the words of the phropets and the assistance of grace are available, the journey must still be traveled alone