Key Points from Book: Make Yourself Unforgettable

Use visualization words such as ‘I can see’ or ‘ I imagine’ to communicate ideas

Take 100% responsibility is a sign of a man with class

Even if you struggle, you have to hide that struggle at all cost. Make it seems easy

A man with class will do goods without bragging about it

A man with class makes everybodies around him comfortable

Don’t act out of fear, use your strength instead

Self sabotaging drives:
He wish to seem strong at all times
A feeling of urgency and need to be in lead at all times
The desire to please others at all costs

Set yourself apart from the usual, push beyond the limit

Effective communication needs honesty or telling the truth, always refrain to the facts

Include the one impacted on meetings

Action and feeling goes hand in hand

Be open minded

I may not be very good with words, but at least you know where I’m coming from. At least I’m honest

When problem arise, emphasize on what rather than who

Don’t raise your voice, nothing good come from it

Make every experience as a lesson learned

There are many ways of listening, but make sure you are not fast with your tongue. Be emphatic and patient in listening. Put yourself in the speaker position

When communicating, ask question and maintain eye contact

Be a man of principle, have a sound principle you stand for. Do what’s right, not what’s legal

If you are disagree with someone, focus on i rather than you. I have serious concern about that, I honestly believe it’s wrong,….

Be proud of your achievement, it is different from bragging

No one can make you feel inferior without your permission- Eleanor Roosevelt

Know what really matters in your life, and protect it

Watch out for pitfall in holding your principle:
Greed, speed (impulse to cut corners), laziness, haziness(acting or reacting without thinking)

There’s a different between confidence and grandiosity. Confidence is knowing your capabilities and limitation while carefully doing your tasks, but grandiosity is an inflated opinion of yourself

Confidence is knowing you’ll succees, if it doesn’t happen today, it will happen tomorrow

Having a high self esteem will increase your confidence and positive view of the world

Five key social skills:
Capacity to relax
Cooperation in communicating, knowing when to talk and listen in harmony
Confident interaction, try to really feel what the speaker tries to communicate
Build rapport
Eye contact

Boosting self esteem:
Identify troubling condition
Aware of beliefs and thoughts
Identify negative or inaccurate thinking
Have an empathy
Control your anxiety, how big is the problem to you in the next year?
Encourage optimism

Defeat fear by pretending that you fear it no more, you used to fear it but not now

Don’t let anger controls you, if you are wrongly accused, assess the situation

Fight depression by physical activity

Build confidence in your team:
Being on time, greet people in a friendly way personally, know your position and make everyone comfortable, follow the dress code, have an etiquette

Train your employees in self development :
Planning your day
Improve reading speed
One hour a day for self development
Practice patience
Be adventurous
Practice constructive discontent
Try something new each day
Ask for input
Use a to-do-list
Work expands tof ill the time available

Causes of stress:
Overwork
Random interruptions
Uncertainty
Inadequate feedback
Lack of appreciation
Lack of control
Hungry, Angry, lonely, Tired

Overcoming stress:
Humor, exercise, drink enough water, good night sleep
Patience is the ability to wait without experiencing anger, anxiety, or frustrstion
Not everybody could work as fast as you can, so be patient and adjust accordingly

Learning patience:
Knowing things you can control and beyond your control
Live one day at a time
Accept and forgive yourself
Change your point of view
Plan your life and follow it
Set big goals, then take baby steps
Confront your feelings about not immediatelt reaching your goals
No worries
Become your own best friend
Sometimes, you have to use your intuition, beyond reason and rational thinking
Don’t get caught in paralysis analysis

Resilience factor:
Sociability
Humor
Insight
Adaptive distancing, recognize negative people
Flexibility
Personal competence
Perseverance
Foundation for resilience:
Trust, independence, initiative, energy, identity

Strengthening resilience:
Get connected
Find meaning
Laughing
Learn from experience
Remain hopeful
Take care of yourself
Keep a journal
Accept and anticipate change
Work toward a goal
Take action
Maintain perspective
Practice stress free management

Fear will always be there, but you and only you could master it instead of mastered by it:
Get moving
Exercise
Play some music
Live in the present
Think positive
Food and fear
Talk to yourself

In case of fear of failure, do failures as fast as you can, knowing it has to happened before success comes

Get out of your comfort zone to better life

See the end before beginning

When facing risk, see the payoff as well!

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About agent909

Kevin Yulianto is a private trader and equity portfolio manager with over 4 years of experience. He was born in Jakarta at July 18th 1994, graduated with Bachelor of Medicine Degree from Atma Jaya Catholic University of Indonesia in 2015 and is expected to receive Master of Management Degree from Binus Business School in 2017. Currently he is pursuing his professional certification in the CFA and FRM program, in which he passed level 1 for both program in 2016. Kevin is an avid traveler and photographer, with a record of 32 countries visited in 2016. He is a freelance contributor at Getty Image and is running two website in his spare time, journeyman.live and idxstockwatch.wordpress.com.
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